Like I said before I read another book by Nicholas Sparks, which was Dear John. It took me about six weeks, I read big chunks at a time but because of everything going on wasn't able to finish it sooner.

My opinion was that it is a beautiful, but at the same time a was horrible book! There was too much loss and grief in this story and the ending wasn't exactly happy, but was in a way. At times I had a hard time reading this book because it was so sad and painful at points.

I told myself several times in my mind that I wasn't going to finish it because it was just too much with everything else going on in my life, but I did. I guess I am glad I did, but sometimes books leave me with strong feelings and emotions. Granted Nicholas Sparks is not like a famous author or will probably go down as acclaimed in the literature world, but the stories seems real enough to me.

That's it.

I have wanted to blog for a while now. . . but when I want to I never know what to say or have anything to say and when I have something to blog about I don't have the time!

There doesn't seem to be enough time in the day, week, month, year and on and on for everything. However, that is just an excuse and also that is not a good attitude. I should be living for now and living like it could be my last minute or day or whatever. However, I really find it hard to take that attitude sometimes when I have all this work to do for my job, school work, my family and "me" time.

My wife and I study the Bible together when we can, and sometimes this is 3-4 times a week and other times it could be once every two weeks. We are in Ephesians right now and usually do a chapter each time, read it and then talk about what stuck out to us and why and pray. This has been a really rewarding experience now and before also, but it is hard to find the time and even desire to do it at times. I think God almost feels like we have to for Him and for life in general because it seems to make things clearer and better for all involved when you focus on Him!

I am also going through a personal Advent devotional this year that I found on the INternet and downloaded for free from some Lutherans. I don't go to a Lutheran church and never have, but they are Christian just like me. Today was the start of the third week and the message in this devotional was about who do you trust. We should trust Jesus because He can help us with ANY problem that we have and wants us to lean on him with everything. I believe that I do this, but then when I thought about it, do I really do this?? When I was working on my 15 page paper last week, doing all my progress notes for my job, taking care of my daughter and being a husband do I always think about doing those for Jesus and the ones I love or because duty calls me to??

Give it all to Jesus!

I have been wanting to blog for a while now about something other than a book that I have read, but really don't know what to say anymore on here.

I am reading another Nicholas Sparks book right now though. . . I think after this one I might have to take a break from them.

School is going okay, already turned in one paper for the semester. Another one is due later. I am not going to give my topics away though at least not until they get published or become famous or something. One of my professors said that the one paper might be a good opportunity for me to try to get grant money to do the research. I haven't actually done the research on it yet, this semester was just kind of setting it up.

I don't know how I feel about the sudden weather changes and November finally starting to feel like November. Today when it was dreary and rainy, I almost thought it would be nice to see snow flakes flying in the sky. But then I quickly remember last year, when we were so ready for Spring but kept having pop up snow showers all the time and it was so cold!

I guess that's it for now!

Just finished another book by Nicholas Sparks. . . seem to be reading him a lot lately. I guess it is a nice break from school, work and everything else. They are usually nice stories and it is refreshing to read kind of a love/life story narrated by a man usually. It isn't super mushy or scandalous, so it is nice.

However, I must admit this book was really hard to get through. Usually, you can predict and know how his stories are going to end even though it doesn't matter because the story is so good. This one I had to actually skip ahead and read the end to make sure that I would be okay. It was really hard to read and painful about this husband and what happened to him and his family. I did read it and found myself thinking a little bit the choice that he made was pretty selfish, but then I thought what would I do in the same situation? I'd probably be selfish too, but it was very difficult to read at times waiting for it to end. It was different from the other books that I read by him, but it was a good read.

That is all I have to say right now.

Just wanted to say hi and let you know that I am still alive. Is it just me or is blogging going out of style??

Anyway, I am still working and as always busy with all of my clients and all the paperwork that comes from the job.

School. . . well let's just say most of the time I feel like I am one of the worst graduate students there ever was because I barely keep up with everything. And let's just say I am lucky to get all if any of the reading done at times. One of my classes is really good though, but challenging. The professor is really challenging us to think outside of our bubbles and really get the most out of graduate school and think about where we want to be after we finish. I am hoping to be able to finish my Masters in English with an emphasis in TESOL next Fall. (If you didn't know that.) But really I just feel like I can't devote enough time to it and I really should.

On top of being a husband and a father, which keeps you busy even if you didn't have anything else going on. I am looking forward to the day when we can move again to someplace where we want to be and doing what we want to do! But keep trying to look for the positive and make the most out of things why we are here!

Still Blogging. . .

Our daugher and mommy and daddy all survived the first year birthday party and celebrations. However, our daughter was lucky enough to be able to take a nap in the middle of the party. . . mommy and daddy had to wait till bed time. It was really fun though. . . if you know me on facebook look for pictures there.

In other news, school has started again and it has made me start thinking what will I do with a M.A. in English with an emphasis on TESOL. Do I want to go on still after this with Linguistics?? Is that even realistic for me?? Do I seriously want to be somewhere and people have to call me DR. . . ?? (not really to tell you the truth), but my mind has been wondering. That is if I can even think of a research topic for this semester's papers. haha

Ready for this hot weather to be over. . . I wouldn't mind it getting cooler again, crisp Fall weather!

Well, getting ready to move again after being here for about 21 months, almost 2 years. This is the longest I've been in one place since I was 18 when I left for college and that has been about 8 years now. Who knows how long we will stay at this next time probably at least a year maybe if we'll lucky we'll stay for 2!

Moving is always such a big deal and pain. I remember moving out of the first apartment in Seoul before I came back to the US for a couple of months with all my stuff and that was an ordeal. I will never forget that and getting everything done in like a 24 hour period because I was so busy! I also remember the first year that I moved into a house off of campus my sophomore year into this basement of a very old house and then helping my roomate move in when he came and going to breakfast with his parents the next morning. Anyway. . . not important. . .

Enjoy the summer.

A couple of books to share that I read over the past month or so. . .

The Devil's Whisper by Miyuki Miyabe was first published in Japan in 1989. She has also wrote All that she's worth and Shadow Family that I liked better. This book was a little bit on the weird side for me and didn't really feel too much closure at the end of it with the main characters. Basically, a man used a very high form hypnosis to kill women who used men to gain money, and the way he did it made it look like they were all suicide except for the last one. This woman was hit by this boy's uncle who was a taxi driver and then is about the boy basically figuring everything out and learning what really happened to his father years ago. I don't know, I didn't speed through this read or particularly enjoy it or get much from it.

However, The Notebook by Nicholas Sparks well that was a different story. I guess I am a bit of a romantic or something, but this might be my favorite book that I have ready by Mr. Sparks so far. The love story was very intense and I am not just talking about the steamier places in the book with pure passion out of love, but how much the man loved his wife even when she didn't know who he was and was dying of Alzheimer's disease. I believe that this book and how it made me feel and think will stay with me for a while, but most of his books do that. It was a beautiful story!

Do I really want to work on a Sunday?? Do I really want to see a client on a Sunday??

Well, yep that is what I will be doing. . . going to my "special" client's house at about 5, which is a 30 minute drive each way to make sure he takes some medication to make sure he doesn't have a reaction, so we can start giving him medications through injections. This client has been a little bit of a thorn in my side. . . he is infamous in my agency and I have had to attend meetings with the vice-president and other supervisors about this client and why he is so off the lines of sanity. I have been in an hour long appointment with my supervisor, his psychiatrist, and him where yelling is involved.

I hope what we are doing really starts to work soon! (Not sure how much more I could take if it doesn't.)

"That people's memories are maybe the fuel they burn to stay alive." This was my favorite line from this book I think from the same Japanese author who has wrote The Wind-Up Bird Chronicles and Kafka on the Shore. After Dark is a very short and fast read, but is another book that takes you into a very different reality than yours. In this story one is very real and the other one is also very real too, but in a different sense. It mainly follows the main character, who is a 19 year old Japanese girl who stays out all night in a neighborhood where she doesn't really fit into, but is there for a different reason than you might think. This book introduces us to many characters that all lead different lives during the night and some of it is very freaky and shady, others very real and personal. I liked this story and if you like this author I would suggest reading this book.

Without getting too personal. . . I am just so frustrated with insurance companies in particular companies that should be bending over backwards to take care of me since they are liable for the accident I had. Just so frustrated that they wouldn't extend my rental car even when I don't have a car yet, a check from them for my car, and need to work.



I should have a car by Saturday though. . . .



So frustrating!!!

Garden Update on the 4th of July



So, it is about the halfway point in the summer already (not technically), but still time for an update.



I am glad everything is mostly in pots, since we are getting ready to move possibly pretty soon. Anyway, the pea plants have seen to hit their second wind even though they look pretty raggedy on the bottom and almost dead. Not to mention that they are leaning on each other almost horizontal, but I have probably 10 new flowers with more coming so that means pea pods. So, far I don't have enough peas to really make anything, so I am keeping them in the freezer till I can have enough for a cold summer soup. I hope that when I put them in the freezer they keep their sweetness! ~

I have two lettuce plants in a pot and the leaves don't seem to be getting that big. Not much of a success on that one. . . and when the leaves aren't big enough they taste pretty bitter. Anyone have any advice on how to grow good lettuce in pots for next year??

The tomato plants having good success with the cherry ones. I have mastered the art of pruning I think because I am getting some nice size ones. The other ones just got some new good soil that should provide some nutrition, so hopefully they will start growing like rockets. I hope that they start getting some flowers on them soon. The rest of the flowers in pots are doing pretty well. . . my marigolds under the oak tree are nothing spectacular. The soil isn't the best, but I hope maybe they start to spread some including the tomato plant that got mixed up in the mix under the tree. I am praying and hoping for some good tomatoes!

In the middle of this hot summer heat and getting sick, car accidents, working and everything plus trying to find a place to move into before school starts again. These all are for another day and email though, but I want to talk about lighter subjects.

1. My Garden - lettuce well I am still holding out hope for 2 of them, but I don't know. It is soo hot for them and I don't know how big the leaves will get. I have had fair success with peas, and probably would've had more luck if I used some liquid seaweed or some kind of organic feed. I think they are almost finishied and the peas have been kind of small to about the average size of a pea. I am freezing them in a bag, but probably won't have enough to make a cold pea soup :(.
Cherry tomatoes are growing well and I am getting some big ones after some pruning and good care. The other tomato plants by the time they get big enough for flowers it might be September unless I try to feed them with something.
I feel like I am getting better each year though, so hopefully next year wherever we are we will have enough to actually supply meals!

2. The Wind-up Bird Chronicle not to far into it yet, but it is providing some relaxation in the kind of surreal like world that the book creates, but at the same time is based in reality. I don't believe any of the philosophies or way of thinking, but it is kind of a nice distraction from everything. It is so bizaire that it places you in a surreal place. I don't know really how else to explain it. Basically, it is about a man who is married and their cat disappears and the wife asks him to look for the cat and then before you know it his wife also disappears and all the strange occurences that happen as a result of all this.

Books

I finished The Calligrapher's Daughter last Monday and once I got into it, it was a fast read! It was a beautiful story of a Korean woman like I have talked about before that was born pretty much at the start of the Japanese occupation of Korea. Her father was a very stict and traditionalist and was opposed to a lot of what was happening in his country. The Japanese did a lot of horrible things while they occupied the country, but at the same time brought a turn to more modern thinking and ways, which is very ironic.

Anyway, this woman ends up finding love and the day after she is married is denied to go to America with her husband who is studying to be a minister. She ends up living with her in-laws in a very poor and harsh conditions away from her family, who were of the upper class which was very hard for her. But in Korean culture once a woman gets married she is supposed to take care of the husband's parents.

Finally, she gets back to her family and they lose everything because the Japanese took it over and even spent 90 days in jail in horrible conditions and hearing people being tortured. They accused her of being married to an American spy and all that went along with that. They moved to Seoul and in 1945 after Japan lost the war her husband comes back working for the US army after being seperated for 11 years.

It was a beautiful story of love and gives a slight glimpse of what maybe Korea was like during this time period and the feelings that people held about their counry. And the incredible sadness that many people felt at the loss of themselves during this time when everyone was forced to be Japanese, but still held on to their traditions and language.

Next. . . I think I am going to re-read The Wind-up Bird Chronicle again by Haruki Murakami. I actually read this book in 2007 when I was in Japan and then after it read another one by this author called, Kafka on the Shore. They told me that Kafka on the Shore is very popular and famous in Japan, but I personally like The Wind-up Bird Chronicle better. I'll probably re-read both of them. They are very surreal reads kind of this feeling of jumping from one reality to another but at the same time this big overall story is taking place. But it does it in a quiet almost errie way at times almost like how I felt in Japan at times, like a dream world that you wonder if it is really real or not? Interesting. . . and I think shows how unique Japanese society and thought patters are as a collective whole.

If you are looking for a good summer read, this might be it!!


(Once again - these books are fiction - I am just kind of talking about general feelings and thoughts not actual events or people.)

Still reading the novel, The Calligrapher's Daughter and I am about half way through at this point. I find it very interesting and a good story about Korea and the time in its history when Japan thought that Korea was part of their territory. I am not racist or anything, I've been to Japan and have Japanese friends, but more and more think that Japan needs to acknowledge and apologize for some things that happened in history. Good thing my blog isn't widely read by more than 2 or 3 people because that is a pretty strong statement. The book does a good job of really showing the history while the story is going on because what was happening in Korea at this time really influences how the story goes. The book started in 1915 and goes all the way to 1945 in America I think. . . very interesting read, look for it!

I'll let you know how I liked it as a whole after I finish!

I am not finished with this book yet, but I am really getting into it like most books that I like and read. This one takes place in Korea. . . which is cool and starts in 1915 and goes till 1945 during the Japenese takeover of the country. It is a book of fiction, but is based on historical facts and could easily see how the feelings and emotions must've been the same as during this time. The main character is about a girl who was born just shortly after the Japense moved in on Korea and her father didn't give her a name due to all the changes and wanted to keep Korea's ways. This book really shows a lot of the Korean traditions and ways of thinking that I still think make up Korea today at least from what I saw. I would recommend this book to anyone so far because it is very interesting and pretty captivating read too. You can also learn more about Korea's history in the process. It is finally nice to be able to read a book I want to read again after finishing school for the semester and not taking summer school!

In other news, the garden on the deck is growing well. . . the spinach and lettuce are starting to grow more. I might have some cherry tomatoes next week, cna you believe it!?

Garden Update

I have two cherry tomato plants that are doing wonderful! I picked up 6 more baby tomato plants over the weekend in St. Louis. I will have to find at least 5 more pots and soil. . . I might have one heirloom tomato plant which could be exciting! I think I should try to grow more heirloom plants.

I have lettuce, spinach, and peas sprouting too and their respected containers and pots. Hopefully, it will all grow well. I should've got some pansies and a big enough pot and put them in with the lettuce. Did you know pansies are an edible flower that you can use in salads??

I also planted some more flowers today under the tree by the marigolds, we will see, but the marigolds are doing wonderful of course!

I'll take pictures later and post them!

I am so happy that Spring has sprung recently! I would love to have a huge garden in my backyard somewhere full of every known flower, vegetable and fruit that you could grow. A garden full of marigolds, pansies, sunflowers, etc. Vegetables and fruits that would include of course tomatoes of all varieties, peas, potatoes, corn, lettuce, spinach, okra, squash, pumpkins, watermelon, canteloupe, broccoli, cauliflower, cucumber and whatever else. It would be a green and bright happy place full of life!!

Unfortunately, I don't have that right now. I have two cherry tomato plants on the deck in pots, some marigolds planted under the oak tree in the front yard, and some more marigolds planted on the deck in a pot. I went back to Lowe's today and bought some seeds; peas, lettuce, spinach, and cosmos (a flower). I am going to try to plant some peas in a pot and also try the spinach and lettuces in a pot. I heard the lettuce in particular could be challening in a pot and the pot needs to be big enough of course.

I am super excited! Some people in my family aren't because they act like we could move very fast and I am wasting money. I disagree, the plants could go anywehre except for the marigolds under the tree because they are in pots. Plus, I am growing things to feed my family and save money, minded it is not much at all.

I know this is odd for a 26 year old male to be this into gardening and growing things. But I have this dream to be completely green and for everyone to do this the world will be a better place. People growing as much of thier own food as possible and sharing with others when needed, canning stuff to reduce our dependence on others and grocery stores, etc. I am all in favor of people using and taking their own reusable bags to the grocery stores and stopping the production of plastic and paper bags all together. For everyone to recycle and recycle everything that is possible to reduce our trash and for recycling companies to do what they say. To RECYCLE!

I'M ALL ABOUT GOING GREEN!

I know people love the big cities including me, but I think people in big cities can do a lot too. I am all about commuity gardening, rooftop gardening, having enough park spaces, trees, etc. to encourage everyone to be healthier and for cleaner air. I am all about looking and discovering alternative energy sources and wide use of public transportation that is clean, efficient, and comfortable.

Don't get me wrong, I like modern day conveniences and I am not looking to start my own hippie commune, but I think if everyone did thier part and we made time for ourselves and the earth we will all be happier.

I think Heaven is probably greener than we imagine. At least I hope it is~!

Yeah, so I don't really have anything to say I don't think.

So, I was thinking my family and I were going to head up to KU to see some friends in March. . . I don't know if that is going to be possible anymore. I was really wanting to go, I would like to get up there this spring but who knows when we will be able to do it. Kind of a bummer, at least I don't think we can go.

I got back my first test back for my Intense English Grammar class. . . yeah not so hot! It was open book and open note, but that didn't really do much. It was worth 111 points totoal, but the professor made the grade only out of 100, so if you got more than 100 it was bonus! My score. . . not even close to bonus level. . . 86 ~ that is pretty Terrible! I hope I can get at least an A- for this course with two tests left and one paper that is due in April. Yeah, I get to write a 9-10 page paper for this class with original research over some kind of a grammar rule. Can you tell how excited I am about this class sometimes??

The weekends just go by way too fast and I could always use more sleep.

People who kow me very well know that I am not exactly a strong supporter of China or anything to do with that country. However, last night I was happy for China for taking gold and silver last night in the couples' figure skating competition. Shen and Zhao won the gold medal and they are a beautiful couple with a beautiful story. They are a pair that have been to four Olympics and won the bronze medal twice and later this couple got married after the male suffered a severe leg injury. This is what brought them together. Anyway, so they decided to come to these Olympics again with one goal to win the gold. They were living in a dormotory up to this point for training purposes living in separate rooms and eating in the dorm cafeteria. The dedication, really inspiring. . . would that ever happen here in America?? Probably not. . . and they finally got the gold last night, truly I was happy for them. Also, for the Chinese coach too for the incredible sacrifices being away from his family and everything to get China to that point in figure skating. In some ways watching that and the story was kind of sad how much some of these athletes in other countries make all those tough sacrifices for a dream, and then when they reach that goal you can't help but be happy too!

That is the Olympic Spirit!

I am excited about this year's Winter Olympics!! I thought the Opening Ceremony was great! I think I actually might watching the Winter Olympics more than the Summer games, but I like them both.

I am pretty tired right now. . . the wife has been sleeping since 7:15 this morning when I took over with our baby. It is now 11:20 our baby just ate and slept for maybe 10 minutes, now she is happily swinging. Maybe not sleep again anytime soon. . . last night she slept from 3:30 to 9:30 without waking up and then as usual was up from 2 AM on. . . :(

Winter Go Away!! I don't want to see any more snow this year and we probably haven't even seen that much. I will be a little upset if I have to take another snow day from work on Monday if we get six inches of snow. I don't know if I even have that much sick or vacation time yet. . . and I need to see my clients to make sure everyone is doing okay (I have 23 now) and to make billing requirements. Oh well~



I am starting to get more into my classes I think this semester, the grammar class is actually very interesting. I am learning a lot and grammar is actually starting to become a little fascinating! I wish I learned all this stuff in such detail before I tried to learn all that Spanish grammar, it would've helped. For Korean though. . . I don't know if this would've helped since the grammar system is completely different.

I haven't read or reread any books this week. I am thinking about reading one of my books by a Japanese novelist again. One The Wind Up Bird Chronicles that I found very interesting and intriguing. This is by the same author of Kafka on the Shore the one that is most popular and famous in Japan by that author. However, I found that one to be a little stranger and not as intriguing to me. Another book by a different author a more recent one is called All that She's Worth which is a mystery suspense that I really liked. If I read either one of these again I will be sure to post a thorough review.

I am also considering reading Extremely Loud and Incrediably Close by Jonathan Safran Foer if I remember was an extraordinary touching story. It was about a boy who lives in NYC trying to find out what a key belonging to his dead father (who died in 911) goes to and ends up finding out much more!

That's all!

I think the new school feeling has rubbed off. I feel not as excited or motivated for school at all this semester and still haven't been able to get into it. I have not done nearly enough preparation for classes with the readings and stuff. I have started to get a little bit better for my grammar class but the Thursday night one, not at all. I have the first project due next Thursday, we'll see how things go. . .

Hi Everyone. . . what can I say I am quit the reader. You know how I said that I was reading The Wedding again by Nicholas Sparks and I started it on Friday. I do believe I will finish it tonight, I have less than 20 pages left. Obviously, you can tell I like the book. It is a very heart warming story about love and life. Basically about a man who has been married to his wife for thirty years and after he forgot their 29th wedding anniversary realizes this his wife might not love him anymore. The man goes on a year long journey remembering how he fell in love with his wife, becoming a better man, and getting his wife to fall back in love with him again by the special gift he has for her on the 3oth anniversary. It is a sweet story.



Oh, where did the time go my three day weekend is over! I have to go back to work tomorrow, which just doesn't sound fun right now. I mean it isn't that work is boring, it is just with all the paperwork and 22 or 23 clients (I don't know for sure) everyday is interesting and exciting (almost more than I can handle on some days)!! But I have to believe that I am helping to make a difference and that I am serving God with my job even if I am not out there preaching Jesus' name.



The baby is sleeping right now. . . I don't know tonight could be a really good night. She has been sleeping for a pretty long stretch just now. I think church maybe wore her out today, she doesn't ever sleep there. Our baby has to know what is going on and wants to be part of the action at all times in public (at least most of the time).



Facebook has been fun so far! And hiatias is spelled hiatus, not the way that I originally guessed it as.

Facebook. . . yes after about a nine month hiatias I am on back on facebook. There were some issues before about facebook that made me get off of it. Oh, how I missed it and all the friends that I have and not getting to know anything about what is going on. Because we all know that facebook is like the main way to connect with people, find out what is going on, etc. I am not planning on getting addicted to it, but I am glad I can have it back in my life. I already have had friends say stuff about it.

In other news, it has been snowing all day! We didn't end up getting as much as they had originally said, which is good. However, for not icing and snowing last night much we are making up for it today. . . so maybe about six to seven inches total. I took the day off from work, which has turned out to be great! I don't have much time for me these days with everything going on. I have already got to spend about thirty minutes to myself laying in bed, with some hot green tea and a book to read a little. I am starting to reread The Wedding by Nicholas Sparks (right?), it is a sappy story I know, but I am pretty soft when it comes down to it. I think that is actually the first book I bought in Korea and read in like three days in my little bitty apartment before I had TV, internet, or a phone. I probably cried and probably will cry again. When I think about it, that was an interesting book to chose when I first got to Korea to read especially considering how lonely I felt.

I like Nicholas Sparks although I haven't read all of his books and really haven't enjoyed the movies based on his books in particularly. I remember I read A Walk to Remember my senior year of high school because another friend was reading it and suggested I read it too. It was a touching story, but the movie was pretty silly and lame if I recall. The books are much better!!

Last night, I had another weird dream. I was in a theater for a show, not a movie but an actual theatric performance. I had a ticket that someone gave me to sit up in the front, a really good seat but by myself. I remember having a hard time because a lot of my friends and coworkers were sitting in the balcony and I felt weird leaving them. I don't remember other details a lot, but everyone was telling me to get to my better seat and the people that worked there were trying to take me there before the show started and the lights went out. At the end part I remember walking down the steps in front of all these people watching me to get to the really good seat and someone had dropped their purse or scarf in the aisle. I picked it up and gave it to them and by that time the lights had gone out and I saw the worker all the way down by my seat, but it was too late to get there I felt. So, I sat on the stairs in the aisle for the show and felt pretty embarrassed and a little lonely I think. I am not sure what that dream could be interpreted as. . . does it mean that I am scared of success, accepting a higher status and role in life because I am worried of what others will think of me and that they won't want to be around me anymore because I am so high??

Winter isn't over yet!! We are expecting 6-12 inches of snow tonight and tomorrow with a little ice before that possibly. We are hoping the power doesn't go out, we have a generator, but I don't know much about that. I have already decided to take the day off tomorrow as a sick day. . . I finished all my notes that are due tomorrow today. I will just have to call the sick line in the morning and all my clients and cancel their appointments. Everyone is telling me I deserve a day off anyway because I have some stress dealing with all the "special" clients. I am a little sad because one of my favorite clients who has been having some major problems was admitted to the psychiatric ward in the hosptial last night. On the bright side that is what he needed and I hope he gets better.

Today I had my two classes from about 3:30 to 7, we got out early tonight due to the weather. The grammar class seems to be getting and more interesting and complex with each passing week. Now we are to making sentence trees that go to the down to the deepest level of sentences! ~

The cool part is that one of my friends from Korea is in the one class. He is cool and I like him and especially since sometimes I can switch to Korean with him at times when I don't want other people to know what we are talking about. I haven't had a lot of time to talk and get to know him as much as I want, but I hope to make more time. Next Tuesday after the afternoon class we are going to eat Mexican food and drink margaritas! ^^ Really, sometimes I have to wonder why do I feel so comfortable around Koreans sometimes more than Americans??

Okay, I am going to have to feed the baby soon!

I am feeling pretty exhausted after today. I got to the office this morning at about 7:30 and finished my class at 4:45.

Let me tell you that Grammar class is boring, but interesting at the same time. In class I was practically falling asleep, but I just read the chapter and that was alright. Who knew there was so much controversy over subject - verb agreement in English, well there is.

For example, look at these three sentences and fill in which form of the verb you would normally put. Then try to find out if you are right according to the grammar rule, and if you don't know and for some reason want to know just ask me in a comment.

1. Marsha is one of those rare students who (have/has) finished the M.A. early.

2. Neither you nor I (am/is/are) trained for that job.

3. Neither of them (have/has) enough money to afford a car.

In other news I was thinking about the dream I posted about last night and looked up some stuff about dreams on the internet. (Not that I really per say believe in all of that or pay attention to it). . . but it sounds like I have a lot of worries and concerns in my unconcious that are hidden and I am afraid of those. Hmm . . . I don't know. Then last night I had like an epic saga of a dream about my family in the past through the years, but I didn't make it that far. There was a lot of falling into the ocean and stuff by people and going through that experience.

I just really want to sleep tonight without any kind of dreams. . . on that note sweet dreams!! I am barely keeping my eyes open trying to finish this post.

Hi Everyone. . . our baby is sleeping and it is almost 9 and the wife is sleeping in the other room too. So, what is there to do besides being happy that both women in my life are sleeping right now?? (Just wish that my wife and I got to sleep in the same place at the same time more, but that is another story.) I can't really read my text books for class (not enough light), I don't have the computer here at home set-up so I can do work stuff, can't read another book for pure enjoyment because of the same reason as the text book issue. So. . . that leaves blogging since I don't get many personal emails these days (I guess you all figure reading my blog is enough for ya!) Maybe I'll mkae it a point to blog everyday, hmm. . . . that is an idea!



That was basically a paragraphy about nothing important, wasn't it?!



Last night, my wife let me sleep for 5 hours straight (WOW!), but I think it was more like 4 1/2 but who is counting. She says that is enough. . . well I would like to be sleeping at least 7-8, but my wife even before the baby didn't sleep more than probably 4 or 5. I would wake up in the middle of the night before in Korea at 2 in the morning and she would be watching some movie on the TV laying in bed. I just can't do it anymore. . . but you are forced to with a baby.



Okay, once again another paragraph that just screams, "Where were you going with this again?"



Anyway, back to last night and the glorious 4 1/2 - 5 hours of sleep . . . well I dream a lot and last night's dreams were weird, freaky, and down-right scary!! I was dreaming and the people in my dreams, I have no idea who they were it was like I was part of a family or in relationships with these random people. It felt like someone was reading a book almost and somehow I was thrown into it. It started off with going to the mountains for skiing, but there weren't many people on the moutain or snow and it was very quiet and a little eerie. Then it went to the Grand Canyon (I've never been there) and going over a bridge or something. Then I am with this random family like I stated or something and I am maybe the father figure. Anyway, we get to this hotel and there are killer black snakes, like we are talking snakes that are smart and hunters and once they get to you, it is going to probably be over quick! So, we all are on the beds all fully dressed huddled up against each other freaking out about a snake that could come from no where at anytime and get us. Somehow, I think there wasn't much light or there was no light and these snakes that are black are going to find us and we all had this feeling of terror and fright. Then I woke up in a heap of sweat! Talk about sweet dreams!



Tonight. . . I have been remembering some other things by looking at pictures my wife discovered again on my computer. They were of my first apartment in Korea, my trip to Taiwan and Japan and random pictures I took in Korea in Seoul and on trips before I met my now wife. It is really quit amazing to look at those pictures and know exactly what I was doing and the feelings behind them. It is also amazing to think about those pictures in my life in Korea before I met my wife and then looking at the pictures in Korea after I met my wife. Talk about a completely different set of thoughts and feelings involved. However, I am glad that I got to experience all of it, I wouldn't trade the days I spent in Korea and in Asia as a single man and then the days after I met my wife. I think I had to grow a lot as a person in that setting first before the time came for me to fall in love with my wife.

Can the news really be true about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie??
Brad Pitt, from my very hometown splitting yet again with another very beautiful woman again?? After 3 adoptions and having 3 kids of their own, what happened?? I guess I shoudl read more into this, but I am sure we will hear more about this later. Was someone cheating, did someone have someone on the side or did they just grow apart with all those kids running around between them??
I shouldn't judge, but maybe a couple that famous and wealthy, and two of the most beautiful people on the planet had too much going on that they couldn't make it last. I feel a bit upset about this because I like Brad Pitt a lot as an actor, maybe I am biased since he is from my hometown, but still. Angelina Jolie, well she is beautiful and I have to say they were hot together in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, the movie that caused all the stir about Angelina Jolie being a home breaker.

This all happening the week of course that Jennifer Aniston is on People Magazine with the caption 5 Years since Brad or something to that degree. Hm. . .

I don't know, but Angelina Jolie just doesn't seem as attractive all of a sudden and I personally always thought she looked like one of those "cold" beauties if you know what I mean. Brad, well I don't know what to say, but I guess I am not giving up on you though. . . just keep some respect for yourself and don't be photographed with some hot young thing in about a month from now!

Everyone this post is a little serious, but I don't think it is serious enough to break my vow for this blog starting in 2010.

I just wanted to let anyone out there, who reads this blog, know that deciding to have a baby is not some decision to make lightly. (I am sure everyone knows that.) Our baby girl is 20 weeks old now and I have to say we are still exhausted and maybe even more exhausted now since the lack of sleep really catches up with you. She is sleeping right now, but not without her good fit for about 30 minutes before she'll take her bottle and then sleep. It is about 5:40 right now and she'll probably sleep till almost 4 AM and then she'll wake up like its a new day and ready to go. Then maybe sleep for 30 minutes to an hour sometime around 7 or 8. But wait. . . were you thinking she was going to sleep from now straight through to 4 AM, oh if we were only so lucky, no she'll probably wake up two if not three times before that to eat. We'll still waiting for those long stretches of sleep.

Don't get me wrong I love our baby daughter, she is probably the most beautiful baby in the world!! However, it is a lot of work and she does cause stress and fatigue a lot. She is starting to be able to sit up on her own now and will turn to a voice when she hears her name. She is starting to get a personality and act more grown up. As much as we wish she would cry less and not yell so loud and sleep better. . . it seems like she is growing up so fast, maybe too fast! She is going to be walking soon, and that just sounds exhausting in itself. And then on to preschool, then kindergarten, then a teenager, graduating from high school, going to college and leaving mom and dad! That just sounds all too crazy and fast to think about!

I have to say I have heard some good advice or comforting words from others. Like you should be glad your baby even sleeps or she is so gentle and happy (when we are in public of course - they don't see the other side) and general stuff like that. One person told me that the first baby is always hard because you have nothing to compare it too, so of course you think the baby cries a lot and you never sleep, etc., etc. That is a good point, we don't have anything to compare it to because we've never had a baby before so I guess we should be happy that she does sleep and so fourth.

Notice that the person told me the first baby is always hard, well let me tell you. . . before I was all about having a family and I thought oh yeah 3 or 4 kids, sure. NOT ANYMORE! I am like one is enough and I am not about to have any more, I mean if we were rich and everything, sure, maybe lets get to it! However, I don't know how we are going to afford this one especially when you think about how much college is going to cost for her in about eighteen years!! OH MY!! I am here to say that I am not planning on any more. . . . one is truly an amazing blessing in itself.

That wasn't too personal, right?? That was just a general feelings that any new father has and things he would talk about.

I am really finding the joy of blogging again!!

I have to say to everyone that I am praying about the situation in Haiti these days because that is a tragedy what has happened! I pray that they get all the help they need and that God's presence be at the center of the relief.

Anyway, the baby is sleeping right now and mommy is sleeping in the other room. I read a chapter online for my grammar class and just can't get myself to read the second one right now. I would like to read my text book, just read a book, or even work or something but this room is so dark because the baby needs to sleep.

I sent an email update out last night with some pictures, I got one reply back. Not too bad I guess.

Today, I billed for 4 1/2 hours at work which is the goal. 55% of face-to-face time with the clients, I am going for 22 hours this week which is the target. Then anything after that is bonus and incentive pay!! I am going to really work in this billing session to get close to the target of 74 1/2 hours billed I think. The last one I only had 47 1/2 but it didn't officially count yet.

안녕하세요 ~ 여러분 잘 지냈죠?!
Hi again, you'all doing good, right??

I don't really have a lot to say right now or have much to post.

오늘은 주일이니까 교회에 갔고 예배를 봤습니다.
Since today was Sunday we went to church and worship.

우리 예나 때문에 아기 방에서 예배를 봤습니다. 우리 교회 세 아기가 있는데 우리 예나는 친구를 있어요 ~ ^^ 예나는 행복합니다!
However, today we had a brief scare with our daughter. My wife was going to put her in the swing, but the back of the swing was not tight, so our daughter fell back all the way almost to the floor! However, she was just surprised so cried, but she didn't hit our head or anything. There was a doctor in the nursery room too and she said she was okay. So, everything was okay, but we won't be using that swing anymore even after they fixed it.
Thank God everything was okay!

In other news, 샤브샤브를 너무 먹고싶어요!
I want to eat shabu shabu so much!!

Hoy en dia no quiero olvidar espanol. A veces siento que olvidar mucho, es triste. No tengo tiempo para practicar mucho o ver las telenovelas en la television. Todavia me gusta leer los articulos por Jorge Ramos en www.jorgeramos.com. Todavia quiero encontrar a Jorge Ramos porque he is cool and I like his style and opinions.
Yo lei dos libros por Jorge Ramos; his autobiography Atravasendo Fronteras y Morir en el Intento. Estos dos libros eras interesantes, especialidad Atravasendo Fronteras porque la historia (the story?) de su vida.
Jorge Ramos si usted esta leyendo mi blog, yo quiero encontrar!

Yep, I have changed the look of this blog yet again for probably the third or fourth time at least.
I like color, and I like this rose color. I think it is bright and happy. . . just like 2010 is going to be for all of us!!

I really want to read a good book soon so that I can post and share about it.
You know the other day a book at Borders entitled something like Pride and Prejudice and Zombies it looked so ridiculous, it was funny! I couldn't see myself buying this to read but the premise was along the same lines as the original Pride and Prejudice (one of my favorite books) but Elizabeth was a zombie fighter too! Laugh out loud funny!

Another book I want to read is Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand (?) who wrote The Fountainhead, and I can't remember when I finally had the patience to read and get through that book. I don't really agree with her philosophies at all, but that was a very interesting and thought provoking book. Atlas Shrugged is supposed to be an expansion of The Fountainhead.

What else?? I saw some other books that looked good and interesting but can't remember them off the top of my head right now.

___________________________________________________________________
A little bit later on. . . so I have been doing some major reminiscing by reading some of the post that I have wrote o this in the last 5 years. I started this in my last year of undergrad days at KU! I don't know if I posted much while I was in Korea, but probably not. . . it's okay I have my own personal journals full of memories in those. But talk about some really fun times, to some hard times, to just some crazy experiences that I wrote about. For example, driving to Dallas right after graduation to visit a friend and then driving back the next night and that whole experience! (One of my favorite posts)

Random Survey:
What has been the most enjoyable post or event on this blog that I wrote about??
Anyone??

It is 2010 and I was looking at my blog. . . and in August it will be 5 years since I started this blog!! That blows me away, how fast the time went!!

After reading another friend's post recently and stopping to consider everything I feel like maybe that I have been way too personal. I might even have shared way too much personal information for just the random person who stumbles across it. I guess I feel like it is okay, but I am going to have to control myself a lot more. I have decided that if I really want my friend's to know what's going on with me in detail or want to get some stress out, I will use email just to those specific people. There are probably a lot more people who read this blog than I think even though no one really writes comments, I got to tighten my reigns. I do this and I am good at it everywhere I go with people, but when it comes to writing and putting stuff over the internet. . . I let it all hang out sometimes. :(
Have to save it for email.

So, yeah for 2010!! I am ready for a better and brighter year than the last!!

• I am hoping that we save some more money this year than we did last year.
• I am hoping sometime this year to take a little trip with the family to visit some good old friends that I haven't really seen in a good long while.
• And to reconnect better with some other friends.
• To find some time and read some really good books that I find or have wanted to read and then to talk about them.

As far as this year, reading books there are a couple that really struck me and that I will remember.

1. Sashenka - don't ask me who the author was, I forgot. This was a story about a woman from an old aristocrat family in the former U.S.S.R. that grew up and came to age during the Lenin Revolution and joining it and ended up being married to a very high officer in the government during the height of communism. She had two kids, was rich, her husband and her were good friends with Stalian, etc. She was the editor of a woman's magazine for good Communist women and was very high up in the country. However, she didn't know anything else that was going on and was blind to the cruelty and horror of the communist regime because she lived a life of privelige and was protected. That is until she met another man, a writer from France and fell in love with him during this wild short lived affair. This was more than an affair of course it helped her to see all the injustice and horrible things that were happening in her country and by the government that she so strongly believed in when she first joined the cause. She was killed of course, and so the second half of the story is her granddaughter being hired by her aunt (that she didn't know at the time) to research and find out what happened to her aunt's mother (her granddaughter). It is a very intense, chilling, but fascinating story. . . it made my stomach turn at times it was so vivid. I thought this book was very interesting and tragic, but very well written and thought provoking.

2. The Commoner - was a story about the an Emperess of Japan. This was a very quiet story, but nonetheless deep with feeling and emotion that you could feel and sense through the quietness. This story made me feel kind of lonely and sad, but at the same time it was beautiful. For some reason, it did a good job of portraying how I felt (or a lot of foreigners) feel in Japan. . . mainly the sense of quietness. Anyway, it was a story about a young woman who found herself in love with the future emperor of Japan in the 1930s sometime right before the war I believe. Well, once the woman married the future emperor her life as a civilian was over; she had no contact with the world outside of the palace and royalty that she lived in, no contact with her family. She was expected to be the symbol of Japanese and produce offspring (mainly a son) to be the future emperor. Well, she was the first so called "common" woman to marry into Japan's royal family and soon found out how hard and suffocating this was to do. She got so depressed that she didn't speak to anyone including her husband, the emperor for 15 years. This story was very sad and made you really feel how lonely this woman was, but it was very well written and I am glad I read it.

3. The Reader - this book and movie stirred up a lot of controversy. I don't know I didn't really agree or approve of what happened or took place, but found it very moving. I admit that I cried at the end of this story. Even though I don't agree with the relationship that took place, I felt very sad for the man about what happened to him and how much the relationship hurt him. The man loved that woman despite everything that happened and how much that hurt him, but to say it was all because the woman took advantage of him and started it at the beginning. . . to me that part gets blurry. He had a choice too and both the characters had big inner struggles going on, but it was horribly sad!