The State of My Health?

Yesterday, I thought I was getting better and then today. . . I don't know if the weather was a factor since it was a lot colder today. My cough seemed to be worse today and my chest hurts more than ever from the cough. Not like a painful sort of way, but I can feel it ache, maybe not the best. I am tired a lot, and runny nose, a little sore, and sometimes a slight headache. Some of you might think I am dead sick, and should see a doctor immediately. I, however, think it is not that bad and feel like I exaggerate these kind of things a lot in my head, and how you feel mentally has impact on your physical health right? So in my head most of the time I think it is worse than it actually is, so I need to be strong and get through it! I don't want people to feel sorry for me or feel like I am trying to get attention like look at the poor American he is sick and needs our help especially from my boss or other people at work. They might notice that I have been less tired and have a cough, but hopefully they think maybe I have just a bad cold, I try to keep my poker face on a lot except for teaching than I am happy and fun teacher, Ty!

I have decided if I don't feel better after tomorrow then I will probably talk to the main Korean teacher about seeing a doctor.

I also have a busy day tomorrow with my haircut, lunch with my friend after that, and then work all day after that! I am going to bed pretty soon. . . maybe tomorrow I'll ask my friend about going to a pharmacy and getting something.

In the mean time today was diary day at the school and the topic was money, the kids had some pretty interesting sentences and essays from that. Tonight I just read some interesting essays by middle school girls. . . a lot of the kids that come to my academy must be rich, I have decided! Korean kids have it made, except when they aren't studying their childhoods away. . .just my opinion sometimes.

I also started making my vocabulary test tonight (small) for my middle school students on TOEFL iBt test.

Other than that I find amusement in stealing napkins from McDonalds so I can use them here in my apartment besides toilet paper or kleenix like tissues!

An Update. . .

So this weekend ended up being fantastic! Except for Sunday afternoon/night after church. I came back home and felt horrible. . . like sick. I was so mad because I was not going to miss work over some minor cold. I had to ask my friend to help me, he came later with his mom with some blankets and a lot of food! Thank you!

I went to work still not feeling the best, and today will go to even though I am still not at 100% yet. No one seemed to really notice that maybe I didn't feel good though or if they did, they didn't say anything. Which is good!

Maybe that is all I have to say.

As I am waiting for my hair to dry on this late Saturday night. . . early Sunday morning let me tell you about my Saturday.

Well, I had no private lesson today which was nice, so I got to sleep in today without stress about a lessson, which was kind of nice. I met my friend Chang Woo for lunch here to talk in English/Korean lesson. We ate at a Korean restaurant and I had tuna kimbap and then we went to McDonalds, he had a sundae I had coffee. It was cold today and there was occassional snow showers. I am beginning to think that winter could possibly be my favorite season. The cold weather makes me feel so alive, and I love to dress in layers anyway so it is perfect. Today at McDonalds during one particular heavy snowfall for about ten minutes it made me feel so much less stress. Watching it snow, the white pure flakes, in this huge city of buildings almost gives me some sense of peace and I feel like time is going slower. It is so peaceful and to even walk home in a light snow shower while the sun is peaking through at the same time almost makes me day! The snow doesn't really stick in this city, but that is okay because I am beginning to love winter and dread summer! I think sometime before the season is up I am going to go with a friend(s) outside of Seoul to a mountain area and the fresh air and walk and see a lot of snow! So exciting because I want to enjoy all four seasons here in Seoul!

I have decided also today to be excited and explore as much as I can while I am here and be content. . . easier said than done I know, but I am going to try. Tonight I went with my friend to 63 Building in Yeouido, the Manhattan area of Seoul. 63 building is currently the tallest in Seoul and I paid 21,000 won (22-24 USD) for the aquarium, IMAX theater Mystery of the Nile, and the sky deck of 63 Building. The aquarium was cool, but not the biggest, I enjoyed the penguins the most, I could watch them all day. The IMAX was cool and a good movie and I had an English translation device too so that was cool. The Sky Deck was cool too at night to see Seoul, it is a big city! There was a bar/coffee shop up there, didn't get anything. There was even a man playing saxophone up there, but it was like Korean drama theme love songs. A lot of people on dates up there. It was very sophisticated, neat area though.

Then we went to a Mexican restaurant, La Casa Loca, the highlight of my weekend. I don't know why but my friend made sure we were going to eat there because he made reseravations at 8 for us to eat there. It was very nice and sophisticated in this nice area. We ordered chicken enchillada, chicken fajitas, and chicken tacos. . . with of course chips and salsa some guacamole too, so good! It was like a gourmet Mexican restaurant though. . . and I even had a margarita which tasted very good! It was not exactly cheap the bill came out to maybe 75.000 won (about 77-80 USD) we had a discount so it only came to maybe 65.000 won about 20.000 each, but it was worth it. I was so happy! There was three of us by the way my friend Chang Woo met us later. Then we took the bus back again and it is about an hour by bus from where I live. It was so nice though because the roads were so wide, a richer more modern area from my home neighborhood and less crowded on the weekend since it is a business district so mainly crowded during the week. I really enjoyed it!

Then I came back here and as I was walking home not too far away from the bus stop, who do I see on the road? My boss, and he is like we are drinking now, "what do you do?" "You drink with us?" Since he is my boss and older I was like sure, okay I drink with you. It was his wife, him, a Korean teacher from Saturdays, and then later the other American teacher came. I maybe had three beers, and we ate fruit and stuff it was actually a good time. My boss was very relaxed and since I can understand a lot of his style and English more it is much better. I was very happy, he actually complimented me tonight a couple o times, very surprised. He was like sometimes after work I go out with Shawn, the main Korean teacher and he talks about how I am good now and have a good teaching style. He is like you were slower to adapt (Haha, and I laugh too), but now I don't worry about you. I was so happy to hear those things tonight!

For those of you who got my email updates, I have pictures that I will include an email of 63 Building, Mexican food, and pictures of my boss and his wife, and other teachers. Yeah! ^_^

Hello Everyone. . . so there is not much to post this week.

I am fighting a cold that appears to have got worse yet again today. Now I have a cold that seems to be in my chest, but I am still working everyday of course. This stupid thing isn't going to get me down or knock me out for the count!

Today I ate at a very good Italian buffet restaurant with a friend before work. It had like fifteen different salads that were all very delicious. I had pasta, bread, vegetables, dessert and ice cream. It was about maybe around 18-20 USD a person but for the food and everything not bad.

Work is work, and maybe I seem a bit less enthused this week or down or something, but I think a lot of it is the cold and lack of sleep. I really do enjoy the kids and teaching though and think do a pretty good job of appearing cheerful and energetic with them. I am starting to get to know the kids more and they are starting to get to know me better I think too.

Other than that I finally sent my mom and dad's box in the mail this morning. I bought a Korean drama (miniseries) for them on DVD, not cheap with English subtitles. Apparently it is a famous one called Winter Sonata and it is the reason I didn't end up sending it till today. I watched the first ten hours of it out of twenty and was pretty into it but my computer is stupid, and doesn't work right. I just sent it. . . but it was kind of nice being able lto watch something in Korean and actually able to understand the story. I'll have to finish it when I go back to the States at some point, it was pretty intense and sad like a lot of Korean dramas. This drama, in particular I guess is very famous in Japan and a lot of Japanese women came to Korea to get plastic surgery to look like one of the actresses in it. Korean dramas have a lot of influence in Asia, I guess and women from other Asian countries come to Korea to get plastic surgery to look like their favorite actresses. Kind of crazy ~ so anyway that took up some time this week.

I also wrote a paper for the heck of it last Saturday about the Japanese occupation years in Korea. I am very fascinated by that era and that is how that got started.

Okay, I need to sleep so I can get well now!

What a Difference a Day Makes!

Do not ask me why, but today was much better than yesterday even though I didn't sleep the best last night and had a terrible nightmare this morning.

Last night I decided I needed to send my first package home to my parents with stuff from Korea. So last night and today I gathered stuff together and I am not done yet. So far I have ready to go: two notebooks with lots of Konglish on them that are very cute, a full size Korean flag that I got as a present but cannot do anything with here, a lot of tourism stuff about Korea with big maps and Seoul's subway map, a church sheet from the Korean church that they give out every Sunday, a book, two bags of Korean chips (one is Shrimp like french fries and the other is squid flavored peanut balls). Tomorrow I am going to buy some of the coffee mix to send to that I drink. I am going to try tomorrow also to find a some Korean dramas on DVD with English subtitles (I don't know if that is possible, if not I'll just buy them a CD.) I want them to experience the Korean Drama though and Korean culture that is so popular here in Asia. They are going to get my package and think that I have turned Korean!

This makes me very happy that I am doing this and that they are going to come and visit me in May! ^-^

Maybe a Little Homesick Today.

Yes, today I felt a little homesick, I am not exactly sure if I had a reason to be or really if I am homesick or not. Last night I sent an email update out and the more I stay here the more I feel like I am losing touch with people. Not many people respond anymore except maybe one or so. This makes me feel a little sad sometimes, but I get past it. I don't know if it would be worse to have my inbox full of replies with people telling me about what is going on their lives or to hear nothing. Everyone is busy though. . . I guess.

I have my own life here in Korea and don't have time to keep my mind in the US or would that be healthy. Not that I want that. . .

Forgive me on this post, I am not exaclty sure what I am trying to express or say just need an outlet to write something to anyone who has the internet and finds this, haha!

Nothing changes after one day. . . it is a PROCESS!

I am beginning to believe this phrase more and more as my life continues to take shape here in Korea.

(Before I go any farther, Ardilla, I posted a response to your comment attached to my last post. Sorry if it doesn't make sense I was trying to do the Spanish thing, but it ended up being not so much.)

Okay, now I will continue like I stated before that I cannot change as a person overnight, it is a process. I am beginning to find that it is difficult to change yourself and what you have known and have believed in for so long to adapt better to a culture. I am not talking about changing the core person or my core beliefs or anything like that those will always be the same. I am talking about small things like differences in work life between Korea and America and the different expecations and boundaries. Not that I have much to any experience of work life in the States, but let me be frank that it is still hard sometimes for me to adjust to this adult life of working. Not to mention doing it in a foreign country where there are many differences. I feel like I have changed a lot to adapt and grow and all of those things, but the more and more I go the more I find that I still need to change to do better. For example, I have to change somethings about me and maybe also have the courage to talk to my coworkers about how I feel. I would say within the last two weeks it has really started to bother me all the gossip that goes on at work about other teachers and me. It is like it never ends and they want to know everything about my life and for me I am screaming "isn't there a boundary between work and personal life here?!" maybe not. Anyway, especially since the new teacher came and they all think we would make a good couple. I don't know if she likes me or not, but she definitely isn't my type and someone I would really ever go for. This is just one example though of where I feel frustrated and don't know what to do. Fortunately, though I have gotten to the point where I can keep my emotions enough in check that no one at work really knows how I feel about all of these things. . . I try to keep pretty neutral, except in class when I am smiling and trying to make it fun for the kids.

I have to say God has really blessed me in Korea with friends and providing me with the wonderful Korean church. I went today and once again 95% of the songs were in English too just for me on top of the Korean words. Then in the small grouup I feel very comfortable and able to be honest and feel supported and can grow in my relationship with God with all of them. Anyway, today maybe I feel bad about complaining to much about the work issues and I need to try harder, etc. I also talked about how I need to probably take care of myself better since I feel very hungry 70-80% of the time. It is my fault, I just need to eat more, and motivate myself too even when I am stressed and my mind is pyscho! Anyway, but I feel like we all are sharing things that we really are dealing with and can pray for each other with, I find it very comforting. Even though most of it is in Korean they still do a very good job of making me feel included and part of the group.

After I got done with that tonight I went out to dinner with another guy at church that I didn't really know super well yet. He is five years older than me, but no big deal we went to a Korean hamburger place, but like American style. We shared two, so we each got a half of the most delicious like double cheese burgers I've ever had. But I was starving because all I managed to eat all day up to that point was a banana and a piece of bread. Anyway, then we went to McDonalds and had Sundaes at maybe the most fancy McDonalds I've ever been at, we sat in leather chairs. We talked about many things and shared many things about each other and then prayed at the end at McDonalds for each other before I left. I thought that was pretty cool and now have another good friend to add to my list.

So, before you are think I am starving myself or something crazy like that I came back to my neighborhood on the subway and went on a food frenzy. I bought 11 tangerines/oranges in the street market, then I ate one. I went to the small convenience store and bought two bigs of potato chips and some more coffee mix. Then I came back here maybe ate two more oranges, finished the soup I made last night and ate a bag of potato chips. I am really going to try harder this week to not feel so hungry all the time because that is not good.

Tomorrow starts another crazy week.

So far my new book The Devil Wears Prada is going well and I am entertained by my flying through the pages.

In other news about the girl who I was supposed to meet on Saturday??? Who knows, your guess is as good as mine. Maybe she'll call or email again, but I am not going to really spend time fussing over it. Part of it could be her and part of it could be Korean culture, a little too confusing for me to try to figure out.

I will try to start taking more pictures again, maybe. . .

Zahir by Paulo Coelho is the latest book I have read and number three for this author since being in Korea. I have to say this book was a little bit too weird for me and really didn't like the story or could relate to any of the characters. It has a lot of the classic ideas that are in all of Coelho's books like that we all should challenge the rules of life and society that we just 'accept'. Also, this book was about a rich author who lived in Paris whose wife left him. It is about her becoming his "Zahir" his obsession and his looking for her despite taking another lover and livng with her. (The other lover knew everything too and was okay with that.) It is about him having to find himself, and realize that he can only find her when the time is right and she isn't his obsession anymore. The problem is I guess that maybe this book is all about the potentiall magic abilities that we all possess and that love is the ultimate energy from the Woman Diety. Personally, I don't believe any of that and the point of the book is not to change your beliefs but at the same time it was almost too much at times. The ending was interesting too because after this man's long journey spiritually, emotionally, and physically he finds his wife after two years half a continent away and pregnent. The ending is like they are both happy about this and like a blessing for them and the journey they have both been on. What a bunch of crap. .. . definitely be very open minded if you are going to read this book.

Call me a little bit crazy, but I have a date tomorrow with that girl I met on the subway maybe a month ago on the subway. Well, we definitely have been in contact and maybe for a couple of weeks now have been talking on the phone maybe for an hour every day or every other day. I feel so strange and the age thing is not an issue for me. She finally agreed to meet me tomorrow and at the least I can say I think we are both nervous and excited about it. We are meeting at a nearby place from me and she wants to walk around the pretty lake that I have been to and ran across before. It will be like 30 F outside, but okay hopefully after that we can eat or get some hot chocolate at least. I feel a little bit crazy about the whole thing and maybe hoping this turns out well and we meet for a second time. I'll let you all know how it turns out regardless, I think at the least we'll be good friends.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Saturday - this appointment has been postponed.

This post will be in green font, like the green soju bottles that we drink here in Korea. I have definitely gotten used to it and can stand it, but it is now 3:25 AM here in Seoul on Thursday morning. I got in at 2:45 for the second time this week and did not even drink that much tonight. I have to admit I had fun on Monday night with the new girl from Lousiana but tonight not so much. We had a dinner/celebration for the girl from Canada who is leaving on Friday. Which I agree is something we should do, but I need more time to recover. Soju and even beer I just didn't feel like drinking much and it didn't taste that good. Plus, I find out tonight that since I talked to the new girl a lot on Monday night and find her to be a general nice person. Also I had to watch her especially since my boss said so since it was like her second night here and I did I think a good job, it has caused gossip. The main Korean teacher was like "so what happened after that? You can tell me." So, now they think I slept with her, I am not that sleezy I am sorry I would not sleep with someone after knowing them after one and a half days. They are like she is the same age as you, she has a pretty face, you look cute together I must want her and need that connection because I am lonely and in Korea. But also I don't even find that to be professional or a good idea to have that type of relationship with another teacher at the same academy as me. Also, I am interested in someone else right now, and I hint at that and no one seems to believe this. But tonight like I said I didn't drink that much or tried very hard because I didn't want to and couldn't (I never want to drink that much with them) but it is like I am looked down at if I don't drink a lot. It is Korean culture, so I try to make up for it in other ways by pouring the drinks for my boss and peoiple in true Korean culture, but it is still like I should be a real man and a strong drinker. I hate this and feel like it isn't healthy. I am not super loud either and very talkative around my coworkers still, it isn't my style, so they think that I have to drink to be more outgoing and loud. But the truth is that even after I've had a lot to drink, I am still almost forcing myself to be more outgoing. But I don't know why this still is a problem because I have improved greatly at academy and in my teaching ability. No one worries about me anymore, and I just do my classes but I am not like these great girl teachers that they have had who are very loud and outgoing, like the new girl from Louisiana. I have my own style, I try to be tough but find that balance of having fun too because if I don't they will all hate me and still get nothing done. I feel like most of the kids respect and like me, so that is good even if it is different from maybe the girl teachers before. I also don't cuss at the kids, try to be overly rude with them, or let my feelings come out about who I like and don't like. I try not to not like any of the students and be more optimistic and have a positive attitude about things. So, work is work and still causing me some stress sometimes and grief, but that is part of it.

Today I bought The Devil Wears Prada to read to really help me understand that my job isn't that bad.

Sorry for the random rant on things, I really do like Korea though.

I don't know why, but the one milk brand that I actually like and drink here in Korea is called Denmark Milk. It is the only milk that I can find that tastes like the milk I know and I cannot find it anywhere, I have to go to Lotte Mart the huge supermarket that is always packed and full of crazy Koreans. I have only had it once, but today I went despite the freezing weather and snow and bought some milk. And now I just want to drink it all down in one day, and I was never a huge milk fan! I also bought some packaged beef to cook in the spaghetti tonight because that is the only place that I can really find meat like that. So, I invited three of my best friends here in Korea and only one came and I am not sure if he liked how I cook pasta. I even had a bottle of white wine and it was okay.

Part of this post was deleted by this blog's administrator.

'There is more things going on, but I feel like those are not for this post are it is too soon still to bring them up. Stay tuned!

Hmm. .. so I feel an urge to post something, but really have no other direction other than that.

For those of you who get my email updates, you know that I was nicely surprised Wednesday with an extra day off to rest and relax before I had to go back to work today. I ran, wrote a long letter to my grandma, bought some home items, cooked, and watched TV, and also talked on the phone. It was very good and I have to say felt happy to be back at home!

Today at work I was expecting to have a new Korean woman teacher, but instead there was no one. Only me, the main Korean teacher, my boss, and the guy that comes in after 7:00, it felt quiet today and a little bit empty. The new American girl teacher is coming to Korea on Saturday though, so she'll be at work on Monday. I have to say though it felt good to be back and teaching and seeing the kids, and today was a good day. Sometimes I find that the crazier I get within reason with the kids the more fun classes go as long as we get some work done. I got to have fun sometimes, especially with the kids else I might go crazy.

Remember the girl that I met on the subway a while ago, well she called me again this week. Still kind of a mystery to each other I think, but we seem to have fun talking on the phone and stuff. I hope to meet her for coffee sometime very soon. . . I think she is having fun with it all. ^-^ hehe!

Taiwan!!!

I had a fantastic 4 nights/3 days jam packed trip in Taiwan over New Year's! The weather was a bit chilly at times, but Spring in relative terms compared to Seoul, my last full day it felt like Summer. It didn't even rain that much while I was there, which was a good surprise.

The first picture is me in Taipei with Taipei 101 (currently the world's tallest building) in the background. Taipei 101 is quit the sight and it sticks out in Taipei like no other since the next tallest building is only 50 something stories. It is even taller than the clouds at times, it does not even look real just like something floating in the clouds.

The second picture is of my friend Kung-Feng (Kevin), his wife Hui-wen, and me at Taipei 101.

Third picture is of me feeling the "Love" right by Taipei 101.

Like I said before I had a wonderful experience overall, except for one small incident. I saw a lot of new food, tried a lot of new food, including stinky tofu (not a big fan.) I went to one of the hot springs area, which was very relaxing. I got a glimpse of Taiwanese/Chinese culture. Taiwan and Korea are similar, but at the same time I definitely saw some differences between the two countries.

On New Year's Eve we went up into the mountains in a traditional tea drinking area for a good evening among friends. We could see the whole city including Taipei 101 and the three minute firework show coming from the building. Directly after the firework show I suffered some sickness of having too much fun, but I recovered nicely by the next day.

Happy New Year! I am happy to be at home here in Seoul, and have to go to work today to see the kiddos.

Taiwan!

Today at 5:30 I will be leaving Korea for the first time since I have been here to go to Taipei Taiwan for three full days, four nights. I am really excited about going and seeing a new place, visiting a friend. I understand it is pretty rainy there. . . but hopefully it will be fun. My friend told me to that the earthquake had no affect on Taipei either so everything is cool. Well, hopefully I'll take lots of cool pictures to send out an emails and post on the blog when I get back.

Happy small vacation time for me!

A Very Special Korean Christmas!

I have been blessed this year on this long Christmas weekend in Korea. Friday was a little rough, but I let it go and realized that Charlie knows I didn't throw a pencil case at the kid and that is why he laughed at it off. The kid is just being a little boy in a class that hates me and wanted attention or something.

Saturday my friend, Chang Woo came here to my neighborhood and we ate a Korean traditional type lunch with chicken that is very good. Then we came back here and he helped me with my Korean a little bit and I helped him with English. My Korean is at a very basic level though of course. Then he helped me find a place where I bought some light bulbs for my place so that was good. Then we met again later that night at the Korean church for like the middle schoolers concert and my other friend Chul was helping them out by playing the drum. It was actually pretty cute and enjoyable and some of the kids even sang carols in English.

Yesterday, Sunday (Christmas Eve) I met my friend Chul and we went to the English service church and then to lunch with another friend. Then we went to the Korean church service and afterwards we went to the big bus station close by and I helped out pass invitations (tickets) with some candy attached to them to people on the street inviting them to church for Christmas day. Then we went back to church and ate a traditional rice cake soup.

After that I went to Starbucks with Chol, Chang Woo, and three girls (Soun, Eun Soung, and another girl I can't think of.) I am getting better there and we ended up being there for like four hours. Two of the girls had just got back from England studying there, so they spoke good English. Soun finished a semester in Liverpool and it was hard for her and she didn't really like it so she came back to Korea. There was another girl who is just here for two weeks for the holiday and she studies in London. So, I talked to them about England and different things and we all talked about our futures, dreams and so on. We all are the same age, which means as of January 1st in Korea we are 25!!!

Then after that I met my other good friend, Yehun and a friend I met through him whose name is So Young. So Young is very young though only 20 in Korean age, and she looks like she is in high school it makes me feel old. We bought an ice cream Christmas cake at Baskin Robins and bought some food and beer and soju. So Young and Yehun ended up cooking all kinds of food, too much plus the cake. We did not finish all the food and I had a lot to clean today plus I need many more things. We had a good time talking and stuff then we watched Love Actually on my notebook. It was really late So Young slept on my bed and Yehun and I slept on the floor with the carols going from the internet radio. They both slept but I didn't at all, which really stunk. They woke up and both left here at about 7 AM and then I got to sleep for two hours before I had to get ready to go to the Korean Church for Christmas day. It was a really fun night, and a special Christmas Eve!

Today I went to church and was so tired though, but it was okay. Then Chul called and I had lunch with him and his mom at Outback Steakhouse, much better in Korea by the way. So much food and I felt stuffed with all of it. Then I came back here for a while and cleaned and tried to sleep for a couple of hours. Then I met my friend Yehun and his parents tonight and we went to a traditional Korean restaurant. There was so much food there and side dishes, but I liked it a lot! His parents are very nice despite the language barrier still there. We went back to their apartment which I thought was beautiful and had tea and fruit. I have never heard this before from anyone, but Yehun's parents said "I have pretty hands." haha! They think I am cute like most people at the Korean church, but what a blessing friends have been to me here. I had a very good time today too.

Tomorrow I have to go to work, so I will go to bed soon because I am very tired! Friday - I leave for Taiwan for about three days!!! So exciting!

My Job.

I worry so much about my job and the job that I am doing. I have skipped dinner time for the past two nights (Thursday and Friday) and probably will next Tuesday again to work on report cards on the computer that are due on Thursday before I go to Taiwan. I have only ate like snack food and not a lot because I am so worried about getting everything done and doing a good job.

You can imagine my horror today then when the main Korean teacher told me about half way through the day that some mom had called Charlie (my boss) today to say that I through a pencil case at her son yesterday in class. He is in the class from hell today, the ones that all hate me that I get very frustrated at all the time. Maybe I dropped the pencil case too hard on the table or something, but I would never throw something at a kid(I am sorry - I never ever would do that even if I wanted to deep down inside.) The Korean teacher told me not to worry and that I was not in trouble because Charlie trusts me and stuff, which is good. Then right before that class in my other class Charlie came in and told me this and was like just don't throw anything down hard anymore. It will be just my luck that more kids will drop out because of me. And during the ten minute break right before that class those kids saw me that already hate me and were showing their disgust to me in front of everyone in very obviousu ways. Fortunately, I survived that next class though and I am trying so hard in this job. I am trying so so so hard and feel like I am getting better and doing well, and then something l ike this happens. Everyone seems to pass this off like no big deal, but I stress so much about it!

Also, tonight at the very end I learned I have to work two hours tomorrow from about 12 -2 with the high school girl that I tutor one on one. Charlie asked me tonight if I could do next Saturday. I was like I'll be in Taiwan on vacation during the holiday and he was like when do you leave. I said on Friday, and he was like "so you no teach on Friday?" I was like "what?" I thought we had the day off, and he told me "don't worry, its okay." I asked the main Korean teacher about this and apparently their is a little party with the kids next Friday and Charlie probably expected me to be there. Everyone says, don't worry but just another thing that I thought was all settled and okay since the main Korean teacher helped me plan the trip and now I know that Friday was a day I was supposed to be at academy.

I am trying so hard, and I worry so much about this job. . . maybe I am not meant to be a teacher. I don't know. . .

Tonight I met a friend and another friend and did some drinking, but this job! I don't know what to do anymore.

Christmas is Almost Here. . .

I wish I had some amazing stories or insights into Korean culture for you to share right now, but I really don't. I have just been working pretty much as usual. Yesterday was Diary Day at EFL though and the topic was Christmas, which means all the kids write something about Christmas depending on their level. All the way from filling in blanks to make sentences to full fledged essays, that the other foreign teacher and I have to grade all of them in class or on the computer. Yesterday was kind of cute though because we got to teach the little kids Jingle Bells and we sang it to them and they sang too. That was very adorable and cute I though. . . kind of made me smile ^^!

The weather has warmed up again and is supposed to stay in the 40s mostly, which is pretty warm for this time of year I think. So, after work tomorrow I have a three day weekend for Christmas on Monday. Sunday and Monday I'll probably hang out with some friends and go to church both days. My first Christmas not with my family, try to make it enjoyable and somewhat special in its own way. I got a card from my grandma today from St. Louis and it made me sad, but happy at the same time. I just need to stay focused on the true reason for Christmas and not let myself get down. . . maybe a bit easier said then done. I guess maybe it is a bit of a good thing that even with Christmas music and everything it does not really feel the same or like Christmas. Maybe if it did I would be more sad. Life is just life, but I am okay with that and content.

I am still watching Lovers the Korean drama that I am addicted to. Just when I get so frustrated and think nothing is going to happen between the two people that love each other. Tonight's episode ended with them together on Christmas Eve and she walks in with the Christmas Couple's Cake and is like we can have a Merry Christmas party in the bedroom like place. ^^

I am still working on my Korean too, which I think I am getting better and better at, but still don't understand most things.

I go to Taiwan next Friday which is really exciting and something I am looking forward to a lot!

This week has been pretty chilly here in Seoul. It snowed this last weekend and it is still so cold that it all hasn't melted, but now most of it looks pretty disgusting due to the city. I haven't felt the best either, my body a bit sore and cold a lot. Not exactly physical conditions that make me want to go to work, but I have to even though I would rather stay at home a lot and sleep. I have been sleeping enough though I think, just have weird dreams. But this could all be an excuse or in my imagination because this week and next will be a bit hard. I think it is the first time that I will not be at home or with my family for Christmas ever! Tomorrow's topic for diary day where the students write sentences or essays is Christmas too. Oh well, I hope it ends up being a good day off and a three day weekend nonetheless. I only have to work three days next week anyway before I go to Taiwan for three days!


I have also made a goal for myself today. By June 1, 2007 a couple months away still I want to have made a decision on what I will do with my life next after this contract ends here. I am enjoying life and work and will continue to do so, but I don't want this to end and then have no clue again what I want to do. I am giving myself some time here and hopefully I will think through things pretty well by then. I will make a decision and know what I want with God's guidance!


I guess that is about all for now.

Today Was Pretty Much All About Me!

So, this last week of work was a bit stressful for all involved. Friday I went in and apologized to my coworker and that was like no big deal. I bought everyone a really good crescient from the bakery and took some juice. I am going to try not to worry so much about everything else except for my own job and doing my best. Perhaps I will be more busy after January still, but I am going to try my best to still enjoy it, get the most out of it, and keep loving the kids. I have to say I was happy Friday ended though and came back and turned the TV on and had a bag of chips and two beers!

This morning I met my friend and went to get my haircut at his salon place. My Lord I love the customer service everywhere here. They took my bag and one girl even helped me take off my coat and put it back on when I left. The style of cutting hair is definitely a little bit different here, but the lady did a really good job I think. And they shampooed my hair after it was all over so that their isn't hair all over me. The stylist also while she was cutting my hair there was also another lady that would take cotton balls and randomly wipe the hair off my face with them throughout. I feel like they did a good job and will go back there and it only cost me 12.000 won about $12 for all of it.

Then we met another friend and we went to eat at Bennigan's (the first time ever that I have been to one) we had a big lunch. I paid because I am nice like that! And then I went with the other friend to a starbucks connected to a department store (we didn't get anything, but that is okay) and chatted. He is going to be my basic Korean teacher and I will help him with English. No money involved, we are just friends and it is kind of fun.

Then I came back here to get some more money out of the ATM and then back on the subway to go to COEX Mall. I was meeting a friend of a friend from KU. . . I was a bit worried about this and how we would get along. Anyway, I ended up getting there early and bought a really nice red shirt that I like at Bean Pole International, a really trendy company here. I also bought another Paulo Coelho book to read, I'll let you know how it is.Then I met this girl and she seemed fairly normal considering who my friend is and that kind of thing. Well we ended up at a coffee shop after walking around a lot. She actually lives about an hour away from the main part of Seoul, but she comes in regulary on the weekends. She teaches like me at a hagwon, but one of the franchise academies in Korea. Anyway, so she has a lot of communication problems with coworkers and they don't sound like they are always the nicest to her. On the weekends she pretty much does her own thing since she doesn't really know anyone, I felt bad for her. I am like that sucks that you don't really have more friends and I wish I wasn't so busy maybe I'll try to do more with you kind of thing. She is going to be in Taiwan the same time as me too by herself, I think maybe I'll try to see her in Taipei or something. I feel a little bit sad for her. . .ㅠ ㅠ!

Then she went with me to another Korean clothing store that is pretty popular here called Giordano. I bought a pair of jeans since I need a pair. I feel like I am shrinking again, my waist size is down to 28 again. I also bought a black like high neck sweater. I am not always a big fan of turtle necks or high neck sweaters but they are pretty popular in Korea. So, I always considered myself a pretty trendy good looking/dressing guy, but in Korea I don't feel like anything special. I mean I have a job and some money, so I can afford it, but not all of the time of course. I have expensive tastes I am afraid and like to look good. I am afraid I like the big city, the constant rush, the people, everyone looking good, and so fourth. I mean a lot of people say that usually after a while anywhere, the place gets boring. I am still not finding Seoul boring by any means. . . Life is good right now even if I don't have a girlfriend ~ ㅋㅋ!

So, I have work this week and then I have a three day weekend because we get Christmas Day off. Then I go back to work for three days and then I leave for Taiwan on Friday!

In other words, I am tired but I needed to do some things for me today I think.

I can't sleep. . . because I feel bad now. Today was an okay day at work until the very end, I was in a descent mood and wasn't too tired. I even bought some more Christmas cards tonight to send out tomorrow. But tonight after work outside where we say good-bye to our other co-workers, not Charlie because he stays up and cleans for a while. Anyway, we were downstairs waiting and it comes out the one Korean girl teacher wasn't coming down right away because she is telling Charlie she is quitting at the end of this month. Pretty much she is working on her master's to be an English teacher and she is supposed to get paid more, but Charlie is a sexist pretty much and isn't giving it to her. On top of all the stress on the Korean teachers right now with the drop out rate and money issues I think. Anyway, so I was down there with the girl from Canada and the other young Korean guy, the main Korean teacher. He told the Canadian girl that he might quit to if things don't change. I heard this and said "I hate you!" He started laughing just kind of joking but then I don't know why I stormed off and left them and walked hom without the Canadian girl! The Canadian girl is also leaving you know at the end of this month to go home, so if everyone quits basically I'll be the only one that has been there for a while (all of 3 months), so I was a little bit in shock and kind of angry. The Canadian girl texted me and was like "what was your problem? We didn't expect that from her?" So I apologized to her tonight and will have to apologize to the guy tomorrow at work for being unprofessional and disrespectful to me. Even though the "I hate you!" thing wasn't really serious and he knew that I still feel bad and have to apologize. I understand everyone is under a lot of stress, but how does that make me feel. I will basically have to get to know all these new Korean teachers he hires if he has to and kind of train the new American girl that comes and hope I get along with all of them! I know this is normal, but on top of just the normal stress and business at work I don't really need that. I am sorry - I don't want to complain, but this is crazy!