A Tale of When I Had Relations with the County of Estonia

Yes, I am going to publish a post about the semester and a half that I had relations with the beautiful country of Estonia. This all happened during the school year of 2004-2005 when this girl K. was here in the U.S. We still talk via computer every once in a while. I just want to set the record straight that out of everything that happened I do not regret any of it and that is why I feel free to talk about this past relationship/short fling thing.

You see, I met K at International Student Orientation in August of 2004 and she was a pretty girl. I remember going to a party not to long after that which she was at and maybe having too much to drink and pretty much sitting down leaning with my back against her legs. I think at this point I must have realized that maybe there was something there but didn't really do anything about it. Nothing really happened until the ISA (International Student Association) annual Halloween Party. Before that I was kind of interested in this French girl (not the same one some of you might be thinking of) and things weren't going anywhere. Well that night at the Halloween Party I asked K out on a date and she said, "Yes" to my surprise and delight. Well two days later on a Saturday I picked her up for our first date and we went downtown for lunch. We talked, well I talked a lot which I always do and she just sat there and smiled. She also made me order for her that day, which I didn't know if that was culture but I thought that was kind of cool like she was letting me have the control. I remember walking back to the car and talking about how that was fun and we should continue hanging out/dating if she wanted to and she was like, "sure, if you want to" kind of thing. The End of the First Date.

The actual official relationship only lasted probably like three weeks to a month. But we would like go to parties with each other and we both always ended up pretty drunk and having a good time that first semester. Good times! I would go over to her apartment on campus and we would end up on the couch laying down together talking or watching TV or whatever usually till 1 or 2 in the morning whenever I decided to leave. We had lunch on campus and did that sort of stuff, but it wasn't really anything serious. I remember shortly after we started going out though she told me about this German guy who I knew too that came out and said he liked her after we started dating. She knew this, but she liked me better and everything was okay but it made me feel good knowing that she would pick me over this guy, that sort of thing.

The end of the official relationship. . . one Saturday night I went over to her apartment with a bottle of wine and food to cook dinner with dessert. This ended up being a success and we ended up drinking the bottle of wine that night between us plus a little vodka later. Well, of course we ended up on the couch cuddling, talking whatever you want to say. Then at some point in the course of the night we ended up laying on the floor and I was completely naive, but at the same time how was I that stupid. She turned over late in the night/early morning and was like "don't you want to kiss me or something like this?" Well, okay so I rolled over to kiss her . . . and for some reason a brief second after that I felt uncomfortable and stopped. Then we didn't talk for a while and like ten minutes later at like 4:30 in the morning I just said I had to leave. YEAH. . .

Three days later we met on campus for coffee and talked and decided to just be friends. But like everything the friendship was complicated and the line was blurred. Her birthday was a couple of weeks later and I remember going to her party with a gift and we both got drunk. We were like by each other and close the whole night, but didn't kiss or anything like that but whatever was left from the relationship was still obviously there at least the attraction. I thought she was a very pretty girl, some people would think differently. Then we both got each other Christmas gifts and I still have the card and gift she got me. She gave me a picture book of the region of Estonia she is from and the card had three phone numbers for the three different cities she might be on at any given time and email address. Over the break I called Estonia three times I think and we talked a bit and a lot through MSN you know that sort of stuff. But then.. . .

The first day I was back in Lawrence after being with my friend in Detroit for nine days we texted each other on cell phones a lot that kind of thing. Well, the first night I went with two other friends to Chipotle and didn't expect to see her there with her good friend from Germany. Well, that was weird because I just went up and pretty much gave her a quick hug and we didn't talk much because I didn't want my two friends to think anything. Like, "what the hell is he doing with that girl." Well, that was pretty much the end right there of any other romance that might've occurred. I think like the next week or so on campus we had lunch and talked and I came out with that I still liked her or something. And her response was, "Shit, shit!" Weird. . . and then a couple months later like in March we were having lunch and at the very end, the very end like she didn't want to say anything, but that she got a boyfriend. But after everything and because she waited I knew. . .

So, like I said she left at the end of the school year and we still talk via MSN sometimes. But some of you know this story and others of you don't, but I just felt like sharing and really have nothing to hide. I don't regret that, it was actually a fun year.